Recovered

I have finally recovered (mostly) from the virus that had me down this past week. I began eating food again on Saturday. Chips and hummus. I know, I'm not usually one who eats a lot of hummus, my roommate had it out for lunch and I decided I had to start somewhere. Back to eating pretty much anything now, though things that are very cold still hurt a bit.

Back to running tomorrow. It's getting cold here, we're talking in the thirties for highs, so it's about time to think about heading back indoors for the winter. I walked down to the gym in my apartment today to check out the treadmill and elliptical machines. I have to make sure there is a place to put my ipod while I am running, I'm not a fan of holding the thing while I run. I have a radio transmitter that I use when I run outside in the summer, but the reception is too poor to use inside.

I finished my Rheumatology rotation on Friday. I ended up liking it quite a bit more that I had originally expected. That is always a nice surprise. The same thing happened in my GI rotation. I can't say that I expect that actually do a fellowship in Rheum, but it is definitely in the running. I'll have to make that decision next year sometime. I begin an ENT rotation tomorrow morning. I am meeting that doc at 7:30. He is in surgery tomorrow so originally I was going to be with a different department, but he is doing a parotidectomy and he wanted me to see it. It's a rather rare surgery so I most likely wouldn't see another in the 2 weeks that I have there. It's been awhile since I've been in the OR, but I'm excited to go back. I loved my general surgery rotation, though I can't see myself actually being a surgeon. It's just fun to cut on people and then sew them up. Man, I'm almost getting the shivers now just thinking about it. Don't worry, I am still completely sane. Pretty much any med student would give you the same reaction.

I talked to my mom for a bit this weekend. She really wants me to start dating. I wrote a little about this earlier. Last time I had hung out with one of my college friends they had said they had a girl they wanted to set me up with. She's cute, Christian, was a business major, is into finance, likes to run, basically has a lot of the qualities that I would like. I was starting my third year of medical school and was going to leave the state, so obviously I didn't want to start anything that would immediately turn into a long distance relationship. Anyway, I told me mom this and she brought it up again this weekend. "What about that girl that Paul wanted to set you up with? She sounded really nice. There is just something about spending time with someone of the opposite sex. Someone to go out to eat with, go to a movie with, just talk to. That's all I want for you Drew." I know that she just wants the best for me. I'm sure she sees that I really am lonely at times. Sure I have a roommate and am able to do stuff with my friends, but I agree, it's not quite the same.

I've been single now for a little over 2 years. This is since I broke up with my girlfriend of three years. Since then I've basically lived in three different state so it has always been easy to say that I didn't want to start anything since I really never knew where I was going to be in the coming months. Part of me really did mean it as well. I also was using it as an excuse to stay out of a relationship. I had to decide whether I was going to pursue finding a wife, what everyone still expects of me, or starting dating guys. I've come much nearer to the conclusion that I will be with a guy for the rest of my life, though this still sometimes scares me. I can just see how everything would be so much simpler if I was straight and started dating women again. It would be easy to go back to that world, though I'm not sure if I would ever truly be happy or if it would be fair to my wife. The thought of coming out still scares the hell out of me for many reasons. Some reasons are stupid, some are your typical reasons and some are because of the life and family I had back home. I'll elaborate more some other time. It would be so easy to be what everyone expects of me, but I'm just not sure I can be happy while making everyone else happy.

This is a really random post. I've had a lot of different things go through my mind this week. I'm just excited to start a new week tomorrow. Tomorrow is a day of running. Everything is always better when I run.